Day 2

Today is day 2 of losing weight. I didn't get up early to go walking because Addi got me up twice in the middle of the night because she had fever. I set me alarm for 7 but didn't get up until 9:30. By then it was already too hot.

I did well eating today and drank most of my water that I needed to. Spent most of the day reading a book. It felt good to be lazy today. After our vacation last week I have been tired I guess. Addi watched cartoons while I read. Steve took the boys to the pool in town to swim this afternoon which gave me a much needed break.

This afternoon Steve asked me to go to town with him to get stuff to make baked beans and jalepeno corn for tomorrow's party at Jenn's house at the Ranch. I'm excited about going to visit with my girlies but scared about overeating and overdrinking. Wish me luck. I need it.

I cooked a pizza for everyone else tonight but ate a WW meal and some fruit that Steve bought me. It was really good, but I still can't help feeling deprived of the other food that they get to eat. Maybe one day I will be Ok with it, but not yet.

After supper I finished reading my book and then decided I would go for a walk. It wasn't that hot outside because there was a good breeze. One of the neighbors dogs followed me home and our dog and him got into several fights on the way home. He followed us home and Steve had to chase him off. But not before he got into a fight with two of our cats and our dog again.

Still not in a good frame of mind. I guess I'm bitter for having to do this while everyone else can eat what they want and not exercise.

I should be happy I guesss. I have a great husband, wonderful kids, and several very close friends that I can count on. I haven't talked to any of them about making this decision.I'm not ready to. Steve noticed that I have been eating better and said, "What, are you on a diet again?" I know he is hopeful but doesn't believe that I will go through with it. I don't blame him. I have let him down so many times...promising him that I would lose weight, You see....when we met I had just reached my weight loss goal with WW and felt wonderful.That was 9 years ago. I have now gained back the 63 pounds plus a lot more. I'm not doing this for him though. I want to be happy with how I feel again. I want to be able to pull a size medium shirt off the rack, not try it on, and know that it fits. I'm tired of being a member of the X club. You know...XL...2XL....3XL...

Goodnight for now, talk to you tomorrow after my day at the party